Medications are powerful. Powerful enough to override your thoughts, your personality, your way of being.
My medications have stabilised me in a way I’ve not been before.
On the other hand it has substantially increased my weight. Like I’ve said before, I dont feel like myself in my new body. So Ive reduced one of my meds.
I can feel again. I buzz. Theres a nervous electicity running through me. My feelings are dictating my thoughts, words and actions. Im not sure if this is the best way to be. Ive lost the beginning and end of me, and the calmness inside myself I’ve grown used to.
Im giving it a few more weeks to see how the weight gain is affected. Then I’ll have to make a decision; what worries me is that its my decision alone, no one elses. What if I make the wrong decision? Is there a wrong decision?


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